It’s back, friends! This is what many of you said was one of your favorite blog topics, so in an attempt to please my readers (ha!) I’ve decided to make this a regular feature.
Either write your own post (leave me the link in the comments section), or leave some of your own letters in the comments section!
Dear Speed Racer,
You know, it really won’t hurt you to park further from the store. I’ve been waiting behind you for 10 minutes in your search for the perfect parking space. Old Lady McGee seems to be cleaning her dentures, and I don’t think she’ll be pulling out of her spot any time soon. How about you move your car so I can get to where I need to be this century?
Beep beep! No, really.
Andrea
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Dear Wal-Mart worker,
I’m guessing you missed your Customer Service 101 training. If you had taken it, I’m sure you would know “I don’t know” is not the proper answer when I ask you where product XXX can be found. Nor is “did you look for it?” acceptable.
Sincerely,
It’s a poor economy and other people would love your job.
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Dear Daycare Worker,
I suppose I should tell you that my husband and I refer to you as “Sassy Sequin Pants”. Really, I adore your style. Tights, sequin shorts, and glitter Tom’s are an excellent look when you’re waist deep in poop and snot. Still, I can’t fault your ability to accessorize. Your beret is quite sassy.
Work it, girl.
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Dear Chick-Fil-A,
I’ve long referred to you as the Target of fast food. Seriously, I love you bunches. However, you recently stepped in it. Please explain to me why I must pay for cream cheese when I purchase a bagel? Really? Panera does not make me pay for cream cheese with my bagel.
Get it together.
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Dear Parents,
I realize your child is probably on your last nerve. Dropping him or her in the Chick-Fil-A play zone and immersing yourself in your iPhone probably seems like the only way to hold on to your sanity. However, if you don’t get your inattentive butt in the play zone and extract your 5 foot, 100 pound “under 3 year old” I will shank you.
Sincerely,
The woman who is disciplining your brat while you check into Foursquare.
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Dear Kohls,
Marking something up in price so you can put on sale for 40% off is not really a deal. I’m not dumb and I realize I am paying the same price for goods as I would elsewhere.
I love the Kohl’s cash, though.
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Dear Kristin Cavallari,
Well played, girlfriend. I guess he isn’t going to break off your engagement now, is he?
13 comments:
I actually laughed at out at that last one, because I had the exact same thought!
LOVE!!! :-)
Hahaha I love the last one...but is he sure it's his baby?!?!
Hehehe love these!
I played along!
http://jenn-eric.blogspot.com/2012/01/dear-fill-in-blank.html
This is by far my favorite posts that you do. I just spent 10 minutes laughing in my office over this. You have quite the gift, A. Love you!
Nat
Hahaha I love this.
I must do one too. I got to tell you Customer Service (I mean, GOOD CS) is a rare art form these days.
OMG!! That is one of the funniest ones you have ever written and i TOTALLY agree with the Chickfila fun zone sitch. There was a 10 year old in there climbing the walls recently. ..."checking into 4square"! LMAO
here it is
http://theadventuresofninapatricia.blogspot.com/2012/01/dear-douchebag.html
hahaha!!! LOVED the Walmart one. Amen, sister! I cannot believe the way walmart treats it's customers.
~Maggie
Bahahaha, your Kristin Cavallari comment made me laugh out loud!
I love it!!!
Didn't realize that Chick Fil-A even sold bagels. The only I patronize regularly though is the one on campus and they don't have a very big menu. But yeah, charging you for cream chz is ridic!
I was just reading another blog and there was the discussion about Kristin and Jay. The blogger was saying something to the effect of, "Just because you're knocked up doesn't mean he won't cheat on you or leave you again! But at least you'll make bank for the next 18 years"
I love this and will most definitely be writing a few and giving you the credit!
Now I need to crawl out from underneath my rock and find out you Kristin Cavallri is and while I'm at I should probably do a little research on Foursquare.
BTW- HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
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